Another Proper Farewell

I guess I hate goodbyes?  I'm not sure, but I should probably look into it.  First there was my slow and slightly awkward retreat from blogging.  Admittedly, I was less than graceful in stepping back from Next Stop Baby last winter/spring.  Though, I finally did announce my hiatus in a vaguely respectable post (here's the post).

Then, there was my failure to bid adieu to Rosie Pope and her pregnant ladies that sometimes wore heels.  To this day, the most read post on Next Stop Baby is the one where I called out Rosie's (seeming) lisp.  By "called out", I mean that I wrote about someone else who called out Rosie's lisp to her face her twitter handle.  I'm a lot of talk and very little action.

You may have noticed that Pregnant in Heels didn't make it to Season Three.  Last April, Bravo announced its 2012 shows that would be kept on for another season...Pregnant in Heels wasn't on the list.  Kind of sad (for a few).  There wasn't even a formal announcement that the show got cancelled.  It was canned by omission.  Clearly I'm not the only one who hates goodbyes.

Now that I'm back, I feel that it's only right for me to formally thank Rosie Pope and all those involved in the production of Pregnant in Heels.  Mrs. Pope and her show were the subject of ten posts, two of which describe the time that I met her saw her in close proximity.  She brought Next Stop Baby a lot of readers and she brought me personally a lot of fodder for sarcastic, joyful posts.  So, thanks Rosie.  You may not have made it to Season Three on Bravo, but you made it to Season Ten in my book!

And Next Stop Baby loves you, duh.

Meaty Discussion Time

Let's start our week with a nice, meaty discussion.  Do you get a little uncomfortable when someone says 'meaty discussion'?  I do.  Meaty discussion.  Meaty.  Gross.

I found the following article through a link on my Facebook newsfeed the other day: So, You Would Like to Have Three Children?  The title is relatively benign.  The content is relatively alarming (and a bit annoying).  Basically, author Laura Garwood Meehan is giving you reason upon reason upon reason to not have three children.  She lays it on thick like buttah.  I stopped reading halfway through because it was getting repetitive and unnecessarily dramatic, so I may have missed the happy conclusion. If you get through the whole thing, please let me know how it ends.

Here's the thing - a lot of families have three kids.  And some families have more than three kids.  GASP.  People of all kinds, all financial means, all over the world have three kids.  I'm not trying to downplay what it must be like or what it must require to be a parent of three.  My world was rocked with the addition of one child, so I have no doubt that the impact of two would be exponential, much less three.  But, I still wasn't buying what this article was selling.  Maybe it was the article's tone?  It felt like a warning: Do Not Under Any Circumstances Think That You Are Capable of Handling Three Children.  You Aren't and You Can't.

It reminded me of that crazy annoying phrase, "you wouldn't understand because you don't have kids".  When I was not a mother and a mother would say this to me, I would cringe and viciously bite my tongue.  Adding the word "three" into that statement doesn't make it any less patronizing and misguided.  How many kids does one have to have in order to "understand" whatever there is to understand?

However, my point is not simply to criticize the article or the author (too late).  My point is this: If you have any pearls of wisdom to bestow upon those embarking on a journey you've already taken, keep in mind that no two people and no two journeys are alike.  So, typically, generalizations are stupid.  And, typically, generalizations about parenting are wicked stupid.

When I make my transition from a single serving to batch, I will certainly be asking for advice.  But, hopefully, the advice I receive will be slightly more positive and balanced.  Namaste.

Update (1/23/14) - Thank you Time Magazine for your (slightly dated) article on something positive to consider about adding a third child to your family: finances.  The money it takes to raise a second child is far less than the cost of the first, and the third child is down right cheap.

Dear Baby...

I'm already going off topic.  This post has absolutely nothing to do with round two.  Well, not really.  But there are some collateral mentions.

Do you keep a baby journal?  I'm not talking about the classic baby book that keeps track of birth stats and milestones and height/weight charts.  Not that there's anything wrong with those, I have one and have taken my documenting responsibilities very seriously.  But, for the moment, I'm talking about an actual journal (think: Dear Diary), but instead of rambling about the highs and lows of your own day, rambling about the highs and lows of your baby's day.  Maybe it's a story about the bully at daycare that pulled her hair or the afternoon that he puked peas all over your comforter, pillow and face.  The memorable stuff.

I'll answer first - Yes, I keep one of these baby journals (in addition to my classic baby book).  Kind of.  I kept a pregnancy journal and wrote very often.  I think my purpose was to release some of the excitement.  As soon as I discovered that I was pregnant I immediately wanted to converse with my unborn child.  Pronto.  So, I wrote to him/her (I didn't know that she was a she at the time).  And then, part way through my pregnancy, it seemed that I was also writing to myself.  I was chronicling the nausea patterns and the first feelings of movement so I would know for the second time because I (correctly) assumed that I wouldn't remember every little detail.

Once my daughter was born I continued to write in my pregnancy journal, which then became this baby journal that I speak of.  It's sort of like a collection of letters to my daughter.  If I'm being honest, I don't write often.  But if something particularly memorable happens or if I spy the journal under the stack of books on my nightstand, I'll sit and take a minute to give an update.

I have a friend whose mother still keeps a baby journal for her.  After 30 some years, her mother still writes about her daughter for her daughter.  Amazing, huh?  I have another friend who writes in one of those "A Line A Day" journals for her daughter.  I love this.  I may steal it for my round two.

Here's the One Line a Day book that my friend uses.
There is also one specifically called Mom's One Line a Day.

My baby journal is extremely basic, it's from Barnes and Noble.  It's not a moleskin notebook, but might as well be.

Here is a sweet one that I found on Minted.com, a website that I love, hence the fact that I've mentioned it in many a post.  They have a ton of baby related (and non baby related) stuff, including a fantastic selection of baby journals, most of which you can personalize with photos or the baby's name.  Great gift.

So, back to you.  Did you keep a baby journal?  Will you?  Do you have one of those milestone baby books?  Were you just as good at journaling/documenting for baby number two as baby number one?

Time for a New Blog Title

Before I return to being a somewhat regular blogger, I need to address a foundational issue.  The title of this blog is Next Stop Baby, but the figurative train reached the figurative next stop back in 2012.  I arrived.  I'm a parent.  I have a baby...actually, I have a toddler.   So, "Next Stop Baby" is a bit of a farce.

I thought about it (for a minute or two) and came to a quick conclusion.  For me, the logical transition is from "Next Stop Baby" to "Next Stop (Another) Baby".  When I started Next Stop Baby, I was considering the idea of considering the idea of starting a family.  Now, I'm considering the idea of considering the idea of expanding my family.  So, the new title makes sense, right?  Having another baby is on my radar, but I'm not there.  

That's where we're at.  Ready yourself for discussions on the timing, the money and the space required for a second bambino.  I will attempt to tackle the hot topics of double diaper duty and two under two from all perspectives.  Maybe I'll even do some research on parenting techniques as they relate to birth order (I'm making this up as I go).  And, of course, there's always my favorite topics of nursery decor and baby names.

Speaking of, I'm already excited about Drew Barrymore's second baby...what will Olive's younger sister be named?!  And Olivia Wilde is pregnant, which is another name I'm eager to learn, especially because it's a boy.  Hollywood has been producing some especially interesting boy names as of late - Axl Duhamel and Kaius Jagger Berman...which I constantly say in my head as Kallus...like a callus on your foot.  

This Blogger Ain't Who She Once Was

Once in a while I check in on Next Stop Baby.  I usually just glance at the home page and make sure it's still there.  On the rare occasion I'll read an old post.  Today, I randomly decided to read the "This Blogger" page.  It needed some updating.  So, I updated it.  It felt nice to be back from hiatus...if only for a minute or two.