Baby Bonkie Giveaway

Katrina who loves the "Marie" baby bonkie is the winner!!! 

***This giveaway is now closed***

First, I told you about the Baby Bonkie.  Then, I showed you my mean swaddling skills thanks to the Baby Bonkie.  Now I want to give you a Baby Bonkie.  Or, technically, the generous folks at Baby Bonkie want to give you a FREE Baby Bonkie. 



Prize: One Baby Bonkie ($64-$68 value)
How to enter (and win):  Go to the Baby Bonkie website, check out all the amazing bonkies and post a comment (on this blog, BELOW) about your favorite bonkie.  And that's it.  One entry per email address.
Enter by: Friday, August 12th, 2011 at 5 pm (EST)
Number of Winners: One
Shipping: US only
Winner Announcement:  One winner will be selected using http://www.random-draw.org/ and posted on Friday (8/12/11) night.  So, check back!

My favorites are below - the Lily and the Owen. 




"Lily"



"Owen"



Stuff People Google 12

I still laugh out loud when I read this one.  Sicko.

winnie the pooh golden shower

Giving It The Old College TRY

Way back when I wrote my First Post, I knew there would be a time when I tackled the word "trying" as it pertains to getting pregnant.  It's taken a bit, but today's the day.

Back then (a whole 6 months ago), I found it irritating when people would say they were "trying" and/or "officially trying" to get pregnant.  Here is the summary of what I would have written back in February:

The only thing more annoying than someone saying "we're trying" to get pregnant is someone saying "we're officially trying" to get pregnant.  First, both phrases are interchangeable with "we're having a lot of unprotected sex."  But, of course, pregnant feigning people aren't generally comfortable making the latter statement.  THIS JUST IN: The word "trying" doesn't fool me, I know what you mean and I know what you're doing.  If you're ready to have a baby and ready to be a parent, just say that.  Second, whether you wear a badge or captain hat or princess tiara, unprotected sex is the same as unprotected sex...is the same as unprotected sex.  It's all officially unprotected.  You may be able to convince yourself that there's a difference between trying and officially trying, but you can't convince me.

Okay, okay, okay...I may not have been quite that snarky, but you get the gist of my former perspective.  My current perspective is quite different, perhaps opposing.

Trying

People use the word trying because it makes sense.  One doesn't decide to be pregnant.  There's no snap, poof, you're pregnant!  It truly is an effort.  Yes, an effort involving unprotected sex, but we're all grown ups here.  Becoming pregnant can take a while and the word "trying" signals family and friends that you're in the process of reaching a goal, but you're not there yet.

Official v. Unofficial

The official versus unofficial differentiation is important.  Official and unofficial trying describe the same act, but different frames of mind.  A couple who is unofficially trying is the college student who figures that showing up to 75% of the classes will earn a passing C.  The couple who is officially trying is the college student who goes to every class (10 minutes early), studies every night and asks for extra credit assignments.  The only thing these students have is common is that neither wants to fail.

Not officially trying describes a readiness to become parents, but leaving fate to determine the time frame.  Officially trying describes a readiness to become parents, now.  When a woman in the unofficial couple gets her period - no big deal, it wasn't in the cards this month.  When the woman in the official couple gets her period...complete devastation.  That's a HUGE difference.  A huge, official difference.

use of one of these means
officially preventing
(image HERE)

I always hear the words "lots of unprotected sex" when someone says "trying."  But, nowadays, I don't mind.

If you've taken a shot every time you've 

read the words "unprotected sex" 

then you're pretty wasted by now.  

Cheers.

(image HERE)

Not So Serious Pregnancy Books

I've already shown you some inappropriate baby books and today I'm showing you some hilarious pregnancy books.  It's not that I think you should avoid the super serious and super educational pregnancy books, but you may want a little laughter and commiserating in between all the fluid and mucus talk.  These books are the perfect gift for a lady who doesn't want to know the nitty gritty right away (or at all) and needs to be eased into the subject.



Pregnancy Sucks.  I think that sums it up nicely.  Not every moment of the nine (...more like ten) months is glowing beauty and maternal joy.  There's something uncomfortable, unpleasant and straight disgusting moments.  There's also a husband version - Pregnancy Sucks for Men.



The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy.  If you can get over the slightly cheesy title (sorry, it just is), then you will find this wildly popular book to be a breath of fresh air.  For the holistic, birth plan type lady beware that author Vicki Iovine does a fair amount of natural birth bashing.  For those who've planned on an epidural since learning that a stork has nothing to do with the delivery...this is the ideal read.

Belly Laughs.  Okay, this is the 2nd (maybe 3rd) time that I've plugged Belly Laughs on NSB.  It's one of the few pregnancy books that I've actually read...just a little.  I truly laughed out loud.  I found a chapter about bowel movements (I love potty humor) and was sold. 

Let's Panic About Babies.  People who read this book love it.  It's written by the authors New York Times best seller The Happiness Project.  Review after review hails it to be so funny that everyone and anyone will enjoy it, not just pregnant ladies. 

Melissa Over's Seriously Funny Guide to: Pregnancy.  This one is a little bit of a mystery to me.  The title suggests that we should know who Melissa Over is, but we don't...do we?  It's a relatively new (Oct. 2010) and quick read, and it's supposed to be seriously funny.  Badumbum Ching!

Did you or do you plan to read any non-traditional pregancy guides?  

Talk about it!

A (Crazy) Mommy Moment

We all know that I'm not a mom.  If I've just broken the news to you, I apologize that you had to find out this way.

So, being that I'm not a mom, you might think I have zero tolerance for screaming babies and runny-nosed children.  While they both freak me out from time to time, that's not the case.  I love children and babies.  No doubt part of that love comes from the fact that I can walk away as soon as I spot rough waters.  Smelly diaper?  Back to mom.  Giving your sister a beat down with a wiffle ball bat?  I'll go get your dad.  And when I see a kid that I'm not acquainted with doing something slightly (or seriously) inappropriate, I mostly shrug it off thinking (and truly believing) that kids will be kids.

Recently I had a surprising need to severely reprimand a tweenage girl.  I'm strolling down the sidewalk, minding my own non-mother business, and I notice three girls (probably 12-13 years old) in a storm of giggles walking about 20 feet ahead.  One of the pack stops in front of a brownstone, reaches over the iron gate that separates a private patio from the sidewalk and snaps off the bloom of a large sunflower.  I watch as she shows the other two, twirls it between her fingers and they all saunter away.  

Pretty non-snatched sunflowers.

I saw red.  I literally (read: not literally, just in my head) stopped in my tracks, folded my arms across my chest, and yelled, "Young lady, get back here this instant."  What I know about sunflowers is that they are rare in my Brooklyn neighborhood, take a long time to grow, and sell for about $9.99 each at the bodega on the corner.  This little brat had just committed petit larceny.  She was completely unashamed of the fiscal (ten dollars) and personal (a serious green thumb) value that she had ripped off from a complete stranger.  Did I mention that the sunflower she stole was the only one of a long row that had bloomed?  Yeah.

Don't worry, the story doesn't end with me bum rushing the girl, tackling her skinny ass and returning the sunflower to its rightful owner.  I think that would have qualified as menacing, assaultive and crazy on my part.  The story does end with me coming to my senses and realizing that the girl was not a hardened criminal, but more likely just thoughtless...like most tweenagers.

As I continued walking, I said a little prayer that my future mothering style includes more moments of sensible analysis and less moments of bum rushing crazy.